A Lonely Chapter: How to Accept a Season of Transition
A lonely chapter is what this feels like.
The Kentucky Derby used to be one of my favorite holidays growing up. Our neighbors, the Conn’s, would throw a huge party each year. They’d bring in a popcorn and hotdog machine, set up a croquet, and create a festive atmosphere that brought our entire neighborhood together.
As kids, we played games all night long, and I looked forward to it with anticipation every year. Even throughout college and in my twenties and thirties, we always went out and celebrated big.
But this year was different. Our neighbors invited us to their Derby party, and I excitedly got ready for the event. The weather was gorgeous, and I had high hopes for a fun-filled evening. However, about a minute after we walked in, my son Parker started to have a meltdown. I didn’t get the memo, but it seemed that no one else brought their kids. It was just one of those nights, and Parker just wasn’t having it.
So, I made the difficult decision to walk back home with my little guy, leaving my husband to stay and make the rounds on our behalf.
As we walked through the front door, a wave of emotions hit me. While I am madly in love with my little one and cherish this chapter of my life, it has also been a very lonely and isolating one. Between the ongoing pandemic and our recent attempts to move, we’ve found ourselves in this state of limbo, not fully belonging to any one community.
We don’t have the new mom friends I thought I would have by now, and there’s no family around to help out when we need a night out. Some nights, when I had hoped to be socializing, getting to know my neighbors, and enjoying a refreshing mint julep, I find myself playing peekaboo on the living room floor with no other adults to talk to.
I know deep down that this is just a season. I know that we will eventually find our town, our neighborhood, and our community. One day, I’ll be the one throwing the Derby parties, surrounded by friends and laughter.
But for now, I allow myself to feel the sadness. I give myself permission to mourn my old life, the sense of belonging and connection I once had. I wrap my arms around my loneliness and all the emotions that come with it. I move through them, knowing that they will ultimately transform into motivation, power, and peace.
I felt compelled to share this because I’ve noticed a lot of people opening up about their own struggles lately. It’s a full moon, Mercury is in retrograde, and it’s eclipse season – there’s a lot of intense energy stirring up emotions for many of us. And so, I want to remind you that you’re not alone. Life is not always perfect, and there will be different seasons with their own ebbs and flows. It’s all part of the perfect harmony that unfolds as our lives progress and we encounter the lessons we need to learn, release, and let go of.
Through it all, I’ve learned to fall in love with every aspect of life, even the heavier times. And you can too. Embrace it all, let it all in. Try to focus on feeling love for yourself, offering yourself compassion, kindness, and self-care as you navigate through the challenges and uncertainties of life.
Tips for Overcoming a Season of Loneliness
While the loneliness may feel overwhelming at times, there are steps you can take to navigate through this season and find solace in your journey. Here are some suggestions to help you embrace the present and cultivate connection:
Practice Self-Care: Prioritize self-care activities that bring you joy and nourish your soul. Engage in activities such as journaling, meditation, yoga, or spending time in nature. Taking care of yourself will help you maintain a positive mindset and increase your resilience.
Seek Support: Reach out to friends, even if they are not physically nearby. Arrange video calls, virtual hangouts, or even pen-pal exchanges. Connecting with others, even from a distance, can provide a sense of belonging and remind you that you are not alone in your experiences. If they are close go for lunch with the girls.
Join Online Communities: Explore online communities or social media groups that align with your interests, hobbies, or parenting journey. By engaging with like-minded individuals virtually can create connections and foster a sense of community.
Remember, this lonely season is temporary, and you have the power to make the most of it. By practicing self-care, seeking support, and joining online communities, you can find moments of connection and discover that you are not alone in your journey. Embrace this time as an opportunity for personal growth, self-reflection, and the chance to forge new connections that will enrich your life. Trust that as you navigate through this chapter, you are moving closer to finding your tribe and experiencing a deeper sense of belonging.
As I reflect on this lonely chapter of my life, I find solace in the fact that it’s all part of a greater journey. It’s through the challenges and lonely moments that we discover our inner strength, resilience, and capacity for growth. So, embrace this season of transition, knowing that it will lead you to the connections, community, and sense of belonging you crave.
And know, you are never truly alone. We are all navigating our own chapters, experiencing our own seasons of transition. Together, we can find solace and cultivate meaningful connections that will illuminate our path and make this journey all the more worthwhile.
Are you going through a similar phase in life? Share your story or tips on the BBW Facebook Group to receive and give support.
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