Givers & Takers. Which one are you?

Boston Business Women  Uncategorized   Givers & Takers. Which one are you?

Givers & Takers. Which one are you?

In this life, there are givers and there are takers. You most likely define yourself as one or the other. Now, don’t judge yourself just yet. It takes many different types of people on this earth to make the world go round, and everyone has a different purpose and path. I do believe, that all of us are good people at the root, but society, pressure, money, power, and other things can get in the way of that and steer us in the wrong direction.

I personally, define myself as a giver. Especially after finding true happiness and connection with my own source and sense of self, I didn’t feel a need to take from others anymore. I didn’t feel like I had to protect myself, or be greedy. The givers tend to realize that there is plenty of room on the top, and that life is about connecting, giving, sharing, helping and loving others. I have found, through analyzing and studying others, that most people who take, who are money and power hungry, they seem to be the ones not as comfortable in their own skin, and often, lack strong connections to others and the beautiful world around them. It is hunger. Hunger for success, power, fame, etc. Kindness, comfort, love, wisdom, whatever it may be, I like to give. It is what brings me peace & joy. Karma is very real, and I always find that when I am true to my heart, and do good in the world, that is always comes back to me in beautiful and surprising ways.

I consider myself an old soul. People always tell me I am wise beyond my years. There are many theories out there as to why some people, no matter what age, act so greedy, so young, and are so disconnected to the soul, spirituality, and don’t have deep connections to others. While other people, half their age, are so wise beyond their years, connected to nature and earth, and truly understand the bigger picture of life. Both, are a blessing and a curse in their own way.

Givers tend to be the more sensitive types. I am sensitive, I wear my heart on my sleeve. I act on what feels right, and I often make decisions with my heart, and not my head. If I were the other type of person, I would probably be a millionaire today, and sometimes that is tough to swallow. I have been burnt, by the age of 30, more than once. Some lessons were cold and cruel, and other lessons felt like a tap on the head, a “sorry for stealing your idea and running with it, but don’t worry, you will do so many amazing things with your life.” No matter the circumstance, it doesn’t feel great, but I never chose to see myself as a victim in these times. I remind you, again, that all of us are on our own journey and path, and we have to stop passing judgement on others, or seeing ourselves as victims.

When you let go of something, you are actually letting something new, and something better grow into your life. So instead of loss, re-define your circumstances as gain. Live your life, be free, and you can have it all. The most important thing, over any, is to be able to feel good about yourself at the end of the day. Do you like yourself?

We also, don’t worry or protect what comes to us naturally. For me, that is creative ideas and businesses. I can do it once, and I can do it again next time, but better. You see, the ones who don’t have the ideas, or the resources that you may have, thats why they steal yours, and feel so protective over them. This happens so often in business, and that is why so much protection exists today. Why it is so expensive and lengthy to go through contracts, lawyers, trademarks and circumstances to protect yourself. But for me, entering the world of business, that concept felt so foreign to me. Protect yourself from the world, wear your shield and be ready to go to battle. All of this is so completely against who I am at the core. I don’t see the world or people as out to get me, or something or someone that I need to protect myself from. But we all learn, we all get burnt once badly enough, and then we wake up and try to not make the same mistakes again.

At the end of the day, most of us are simply doing the best that we can, with the tools that we have, and that is all that anyone can ever ask of you. For the rest though, the people who don’t seem to have a conscience, and don’t mind stepping on everyone else to get to the top, well karma and the universe will take care of those types. You don’t have to take it on yourself to teach these people a lesson, so don’t try to. What you wish onto others, will always come back to you.

I am always fascinated by those articles, the ones who interview the elderly on their death beds and ask them about their lives. From People Magazine, to Huff Post, to CNN, all of the themes and responses from the interviews are the same. “I wish I enjoyed life more. I wish I worried less. I wish I didn’t work so hard. I wish I spent more time with family & friends. I wish I didn’t spend so much of my life focused on making money and being powerful.” It is in these lessons, in the wisdom of the elderly, and the ones who have lived, that we can all learn from. So now, in closing, I ask you to challenge yourself. Ask yourself, why did I make that decision? If money wasn’t involved, would I still have made it? Did it serve me? Did it help others? Did it truly make me feel fufilled and happy?” Start being honest with yourself about the life you want to live, and what you might regret in 50 years from now.

I do go to bed at night, and wish for a more peaceful world. Less power and control driven people who make the world a scary place to live in. I wish for more caring and kindness, empathy and understanding. We can’t let ourselves grow sick over what we cannot control, but we can define our life, our circumstances and our stories. Does your past, your present and your future support you or not? If it doesn’t make you feel happy, supported and fufilled, then change how you read your lifes story to yourself. Remind yourself all the lessons you learned, how strong you have become, how much you have overcome, and how much more you have to offer. When you let go of something, you are actually letting something new, and something better grow into your life. So instead of loss, re-define your circumstances as gain. Live your life, be free, and you can have it all. The most important thing, over any, is to be able to feel good about yourself at the end of the day. Do you like yourself? Are you comfortable in your own skin? Are you treating others the way you want to be treated in the future? Let that be the most important lesson you take with you to bed at night, and hopefully we can all work on being better people, and making the world go round 🙂 When we love ourselves more, we offer more love to others. It takes going inward first, to be able to change any circumstances on the outside.

Author:  Kristina Tsipouras, Founder of Boston Business Women, CEO of Moroccan Magic, Founder of Busy Girl Daily

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